#7 FISHING FOR WORDS
Do you read the fishing column? I do, but just for fun.
I have never fly-fished, though I have girlfriends who love casting a line. Actually, I am quite good at that, but verbally or in writing, not from the riverbank.
As a child we put a bent pin on the end of string tied to a wonky pole, and relished stabbing poor earthworms as bait. We never caught anything, but you never expected to.
Nowadays (I refuse to say: Anymore) although I think some fancy-named worms are still sold, the description of successful bait has become a lyrical list which I enjoy reading. None of it means anything to me, apart from ‘garlic cheese’ and ‘chicken liver’ – what a waste! Did I ever tell you about the Liver Lovers’ Lunch Club? Ok, I’ll save that for another day. But I’d like to know how you put soft cheese on a hook so it doesn’t just wash off?
Back to Bait – were you waiting with bated breath for me to get on with it? I know some of these may be tied flies (not real ones, I’m assured) but to me they are still a kind of bait. So you’re stuck with it.
How about these wonderful names:
copper super dupers
gold panther Martins (Cats should be good at catching fish though I’ve never seen a gold panther)
olive bead head drakes (aren’t those ducks??)
Pistol Petes (with capital letters, even)
spoons – even some golden spoons (for rich fishermen?)
These sound too big to be workable: hare’s ears or pheasant tails.
And then there are:
jigs, grubs, tubes & deep diving crank baits (very clever, those ones)
fore and aft midges, and midge clusters, Griffiths gnats (Griffith can have them!)
BWOs (?), RS2s (again, ?) and parachute Adams (that sounds like a movie hero)
I know I’m being facetious, but come on. Aren’t they funny? I’m not really interested in knowing what they mean. I just wanted a good hook for my blog.